Three Feet and Over

Katie (3rd grade): Are you high?

Me: Huh?

Katie: You talk like you're high.

Me: What do you mean?

Katie: You talk really slow!

Me: Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhhhh. IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII sssssssssssssseeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!

Jill(age 8): do you have a boyfriend?
Me: no.
Abby(age 6): why not?
Me: I don't know.
Kelly(age 6): because you havent been asked yet?
Me: I guess so.
Kelly: why havent you been asked out yet?
Me: I don't know.
Jill: but youre pretty and nice!
Me: ♥

"A million years please??"

Jenny(age 7): yeah, my parents are my servants. They do whatever I want.
Jake(age 7): yeah mine too.
Me: what??
Jenny: oh you will learn. You will learn when you have children.

Jane(age 7): I wish your face was in a magazine.
Me: why is that?
Jane: so I could look at you all the time!

7 year old girl: will you give me some money?
me: for what? 
girl: for being adorable!

little 5 year old girl: yeah, this is a free country.....I think.

Lydia(age 5): Miss Susanna, will you give me the answers?
Me: no, I dont need to learn them, you do. 
Lydia: will you learn me then?

"yeah, that was two yesterdays ago."-7 yr old

Me: what do you want to do when you grow up? 

Jim (age 6): I want to get married with my mommy.

"my eyes get sweaty when I blink."-6 yr old